Just like me

“Remember she may share very similar traits with you, but she is not you.” Told by a friend, these words moved me unexpectedly physically as it did emotionally. I felt the muscles in my shoulders stiffen immediately and defensively, my throat narrow as I tried to swallow the emotions that were arising within me. It [...]

LAUGHTER

Written together with my children. Laughter starts with a giggle. Laughter is noise added to a smile. Laughter is living in the moment. Laughter is spontaneous. Laughter is impulsive. Laughter is real. Laughter is authentic. Laughter is sharing love. Laughter relaxes. Laughter is playful. Laughter is pure delight. Laughter is loud. Laughter is liberating. Laughter [...]

Unpacking Stress

Building self-awareness and emotional resilience   “Of course my children are not stressed. What’s there for them to be stressed about? They have food on the table, a roof over their heads. They have nothing to worry about…” Like many, I have been guilty of making statements like this. If we ask grown-ups to define stress, [...]

Room for settling conflict

Enforcing a ceasefire and self-regulated dispute resolution “Staff members are strongly encouraged to first try and solve a dispute through informal channels…Resolving disputes through negotiation, mediation and other alternative means is usually quicker, and often proves to be less stressful and less cumbersome…” A guide to resolving disputes, Administration of Justice in the United Nations [...]

The Tale of Two Arrows

Neither an archer nor a target be… The Tale of Two Arrows from the Sallatha Sutta is an interesting representation of how humans experience physical and emotional pain.  When experiencing physical pain, the human body suffers a bodily sensation, discomfort or injury. In this depiction, this pain is referred to as the first arrow. The [...]

There is Power in Absence

A little distance in love can provide a refreshing perspective and personal growth. It was 6:35am. We were having as relaxing breakfast on a weekday morning before the children departed for school. Seated around the dining table, there was lively chatter in anticipation of the day ahead. Then one of the children realised that I [...]

A Convincing “No”

Fostering assertiveness in the complaisant “He didn’t listen to me. He just didn’t get what I was trying to say.” She turned her face away from me, self-piteous and dejected. I reached my arms out and pulled her into an embrace. She grudgingly accepted a hug. Moments later, I felt my shoulder feel damp from [...]